Call me narcissist if you must but this blog is all about ME. I have another blog about my kids, whom I love and adore writing about. But I was Nicole a long time before I was mom and I don't intend to give up being Nicole overnight.
You can read all about my kids at Naptime Optional.
Or you can follow along on our Arizona adventure on my 365 project blog.
Friday, April 10, 2009
So today I thought I'd share with you the first time I REALLY freaked out. The moment I really realized I was responsible for this little life.
I am not entirely sure exactly how many days we had been home. I do remember that Mike had returned to work. And I was still on the really good pain medications. And for some reason that I can't now fully understand I found it absolutely necessary to go THAT DAY and buy Adam a blessing outfit.
Remember, I had just said that I was still taking the heavy pain meds (he was a 9 1/2 pound baby and was delivered with forceps so I was pretty torn apart) which means I SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN DRIVING. But this didn't even occur to me. I just knew I HAD to have his blessing outfit that day. It was apparently imperative to life as we know it.
So I load my baby into his car seat and we climb into our trusty little Nissan Sentra and off we go.
And it was the LONGEST drive of my life!!! Evey bump in the road I was sure I had just blown a tire. Every intersection I came to I was CERTAIN the other cars were not going to stop. I was jittery and afraid the entire drive. Every car on the road seemed out to hurt my baby. In my mind's eye my little Sentra was going to end up as a twisted mass of steel before we reached our destination.
Gladly, we did reach our destination, but by the time we got there I was a wreck. I sat in the car sobbing. I knew I couldn't safely drive us back home.
So I called my husband. Through heaving sobs I explained to him where I was and that he needed to come get me and the baby and drive us home.
Being a good husband he came immediately. He returned me and the baby to the safety of our home and then had to call his mom to go back to the store with him to get his vehicle.
Needless to say it was a LONG time before I drove anywhere alone with the baby again.