Just my pride was wounded, for the most part

I know many of you are patiently waiting for more pictures of the progress on the big backyard project. Well, and some of you not so patiently, too. I've actually had phone calls, emails, and tweets requesting more pictures! (which, of course makes me feel loved and missed. Thanks for that!)

And I WILL be posting more soon, I promise. But I ran into a little snag today that is delaying the processing and posting of these pictures.

Believe it or not I actually took my first ride in an ambulance today. And it wasn't nearly as exciting at it sounds.

The cement truck showed up bright and early this morning, and the kids were having a
great time watching the big trucks. The patio was looking AWESOME and it really was shaping up to be a great day.

Around noon I loaded the kids up in the car to go to the credit union. I needed to withdraw some money and I thought we could go make the withdrawal, pick up Aunt Natalie (who works at the credit union), go to lunch, and then drop Natalie back off and head home. It was a chance to get the kids out and let them run around a bit so they wouldn't be stir crazy later.

On our arrival at the credit union I load the baby into the stroller. Of course this prompts the older two to fight over who gets to push the stroller. Adam must've actually listened to some of my lectures on being a gentleman and letting Zoey take turns first because he actually told her that she could push it first. Zoey is going through a severe "all by myself" stage right now and was being a bit obnoxious about letting me help her. But in as much as we were in a parking lot AND that she's actually too short to see over the top of the stroller I was insisting helping. In the course of this struggle through the parking lot I tripped over her feet and, since I was just wearing flip-flops (which my husband would tell you was my first problem) I stubbed my toe pretty good.

As we got into the credit union my toe started to really hurt. At this point I was pretty darn sure it was actually broken. But I here on a mission and didn't want to be deterred. I would just have to deal with the broken toe in a minute.

I walked up to teller's counter and told her what I needed. By now my toe was REALLY starting to hurt, and swell up, and get purple. And I was feeling slightly sick to my stomach. (I'm pretty much a baby and have a pretty low tolerance for pain. I also get nauseous at the sight of blood, or if somebody else is hurt.)

I tell the teller what I need and she tells me she'll have to go to the vault to get cash. As she walks away I am starting to feel a bit lightheaded and decide that while I wait I'm going to sit down. The kids have run off to the "kids corner" and are happily amusing themselves so I find me a chair and put my head down and start breathing deeply, hoping the woozy feeling will pass quickly.

The teller got back quicker than I expected so I took a deep breath, and thought I would be okay to stand up again. By now I was pretty much hobbling as I tried to make my way back to the teller. I pulled out my ID (knowing they would want it for a cash withdrawal) and about then the room really started to spin and my field of vision started to close in on me. I knew this was the tel-tale sign that I was about to pass out. I remember kind of leaning into the counter for support and saying "oh shit" under my breath.

The next thing I remember I'm waking up from what felt like a deep sleep and a weird dream, but there were bright lights and lots of people standing around me. I was really confused about what was going on at first. They were asking me my name and how old I was and if I had any medical conditions.

Slowly I began to remember where I was and realized what happened. I wanted to tell everybody that I would be fine and to just go about their business, but they had already called the paramedics, who were rushing in right at that moment.

And then all the questions began again. Name? Age? Social? Last menstrual cycle? Are you pregnant? Do you have any allergies? Do you hurt anywhere?

Well yes! My toe hurts! That was the original cause of all this in the first place! Oh, and my head hurts because, in case you didn't notice, I just used it to break my fall on this lovely tile floor.

I kept trying to explain to them that I do in fact have a history of fainting when I'm hurt or have blood drawn, and that I had drank a Dr. Pepper on and empty stomach, it was over 100 degrees outside and I was likely dehydrated since I hadn't had any water today, that I didn't have pain in my neck or back, and if they would just sit me up in a chair and give me some water and some food and a little ice for the back of my head that I'd be fine in a few minutes.

So what did they do instead? Leave my kids with my sister, (who had come downstairs by this time) wrap my neck in a brace, strap me to a backer board, and transport me to the hospital in the back of an ambulance.

All I could think the entire way to the hospital was "how much is this going to cost me?" Which means that the fall didn't result in any serious brain injury.

Once at the hospital they stick me in the "triage room" and then leave me there alone, waiting for a Dr. to come "clear me" to be taken off the backer board. So as I lay there alone I just keep thinking how ridiculous this whole thing is. "triage room" sounds like a place for people with things protruding from their chests, or for people how have rented a small limb shredder Not for people who have a broken toe and some mild nausea, which at this point was actually becoming worse by the minute. But the problem was I was alone in a room and strapped to a backer board, meaning if I had to throw up I was going to be wearing it all. So I began trying REALLY hard not to throw up.

About this point somebody came in and I started doing mental cheers, thinking that this nightmare was about to come to a quick close.

I was wrong. It was a nurse coming to take my blood and give me an IV, which I began immediately to protest. I told her, in no uncertain terms, that I was already dizzy and nauseous and that usually taking blood just makes that worse. Plus I was fine, REALLY. There was no need to stick in an IV "just in case" because I wasn't going to need it! And could I just PLEASE have a little water instead because I really think that would help me not throw up. And how much longer do I have to be on this stinking board anyway? Because my head is really starting to hurt!

She didn't listen to me, of course. She stuck me with her needle anyway, and didn't give me water, and told me I'd just have to wait for the doctor to take me off the board.

This was not turning out to be the good day I had expected.

When Mike showed up I was STILL on the stinking backer board. And getting really upset about it at this point. Do you have any idea how uncomfortable those things are? My hips and legs were really starting to ache from being confined for so long. And my head, which I hit on the tile floor, was really starting to hurt from being pressed up against the hard board. Plus I was really tired of staring up at the spot light on the ceiling!!!!

So when the door opened again I was really hopeful that it was FINALLY the dr. Of course it wasn't. It was the mean IV nurse again. This time come to give me and EKG. Apparently standard procedure when somebody comes in after fainting. And completely unnecessary. Why wasn't anybody listening to me when I told them that I am prone to fainting and that my toe just hurt! My heart is fine!!! Give me some water and some pain killer for my toe please!!!! And get me off this backer board before I kill somebody!!!!!!!!!

Here are a few pictures Mike took with his cell phone.





I look like I have huge teeth in that picture....oh well.


When the dr. eventually arrived on the scene, an hour later, I was in tears because I just couldn't stand being on that thing any longer! I was pretty darn close to just ripping the velcro straps off myself. It was such a relief to have a soft pillow behind my head. I was still woozy and wanted to puke, but at least I was on something soft now. And that helped.

Of course the first doctor didn't stay long. So then we were again playing the waiting game for another doctor to come in and give me the official work over. When she came in I was still feeling a bit stiff from being strapped on for so long, so when I sat up I kind of winced at the stiff pain in my back. So that certainly must mean I hurt my back when I fell and so she ordered x-rays.

I kept insisting that I was just a bit stiff and that I was fine. But I still hadn't had any food or liquid at this point and so when she had me stand up for her I got all pale and woozy again, which also freaked her out a bit. (even though I had been asking for something to drink and eat since the moment they wheeled me in!!!)

So I had to put the lovely hospital gown on and was wheeled off for x-rays of my lower back and my little toe.

When they returned me to the triage room after my x-rays there was finally something for me to drink and nibble on. I started with the apple juice and cookie, in an attempt to raise my blood sugar levels quickly. And boy was it was a night and day difference in how I felt!!!! The nausea finally subsided and I could sit up without the room spinning.

So I ate, and we waited, and waited, and waited. Somebody came in to take the kid books that were in my room. And we waited some more. I eventually took it upon myself to put my clothes back on because I was that sure that once the doctor looked at the x-rays that they would be sending me home.

After some more waiting the doctor came in and guess what the prognosis was....I had a broken toe and a small bump on the back of my head. Nothing more. So they taped up my toe, gave me an RX for some pain meds, and sent me on my merry way. 4 1/2 hours later.

On the way home I told Mike that Disneyland would've been cheaper than my little (completely unnecessary) trip to the ER, and it would've been a lot more fun!

So it looks like I'll be staying off my feet for a little while. Which means the backyard remodel will have to go on without my help for the time being.

The good news is that I'll have lots of time to post all the pictures that I've taken so far.

But not tonight. Because tonight I just took some lovely pain medications that are about to put me to sleep.